She loved him, he needed her
by AlexandraBastian
Summary: A one-shot based upon last night's episode. What happened when Sam and Fletch spent the night in the on-call room after Fletch came clean and Sam kissed Iain. {NEW CHAPTER ADDED; based on what happened after the wedding and Fletch's arrest. Sam and Fletch get their last goodbye.}
1. Chapter 1

**Just a one-shot inspired by last night's episode of Casualty. Sam and Fletch had me in tears, seriously.**

* * *

Fletch had set himself up for the night in the on-call room. He'd chucked his bag in the corner and sat down on the tiny bed, his head in his hands. He'd told Natalie and she'd kicked him out.. Of course, he hadn't dropped Tess' name in, just like Zoe had asked, instead making up some other nurse that 'was long gone'. But Nat had already known, she'd told him just days before that she thought that he'd been with someone else... He thought she might have accepted it just that tiny bit easier. But no. She'd kicked him out, broken down in front of him, _hell_ he was surprised that she hadn't slapped him one.

He was _scared_. That's for sure. Not of having no where to live, he could deal with that. He was scared of her not letting him back into her life, if only just to see their children.. Because they were the most important thing to him. And their baby, that she was pregnant with... He'd lost one child over the last few months, one child that wouldn't be brought to life... He wanted to see this one born, he wanted to be in it's life. And the possibility that he'd completely gone and cocked that up was what worried him, in fact it petrified him.

He was torn away from his thoughts by the sound of the door opening. He looked up and saw Sam stood in the door way, looking just as surprised as he felt.

"Oh, Fletch.. I didn't realize that you were in here." She said. "I'll just go."

"No, don't worry. You can come in..." He said.

She smiled. "I had planned on staying tonight, but it looks like you had too..."

"Well we could always share." He replied.

She pursed her lips and nodded. "I'll have the sofa."

He got to his feet and shook his head. "Don't be silly, you can have the bed."

"No, no. First come, first serve." She sat down on the sofa, so he sighed and gave up, sitting back on the bed opposite her. "Shouldn't you be at home?"

"Don't ask." He answered, a frown furrowing his eyebrows.

"Oh.." She bit down on her bottom lip and analysed his face.

He looked down at the floor, to stop her looking at him, almost as if she would be able to tell his situation by looking at him. "Shouldn't you be with Tom?"

"Don't ask." She said, that wave of distress washing over her again... Just like it had outside the pub._ Oh god, she'd kissed Iain_. She shouldn't have, and regretted it the second she pulled away. She was with Tom, they were getting married for gods sake! Well, _supposed to be_.

"Oh." Fletch looked up at her and could see from her eyes that she was ready to cry. "I could do with a hug though..."

Sam met his eyes and half-heartedly smiled. "So could I."

Their pair of them stood up and took the tiny step forwards, before enveloping each other in an embrace. His arms were around her shoulders and neck, pulling her face flush against his chest, where she buried into him and tried to hold back the tears.

Whilst she was there, Sam thought about this intimate moment. Never in a million years did she expect herself to be sharing the on-call room with Fletch, who seemed just as distressed as she was. Never in a million years did she expect to have him comfort her, never in a million years did she expect that she would feel so serene in his arms. She wasn't thinking that she was instantly smitten with Fletch, oh no, in her mind that would never happen.. But she felt some kind of tranquility with him, and she realized that she did in fact**_ love him_**. But only as the older brother she'd never had.

Fletch was also thinking about it. The usually so strong and stubborn Doctor Nicholls was here, in his arms, close to breaking down. It was so unusual to see her in this way, he hadn't expected to see her at all tonight. He wondered what had her in such distress, probably something to do with Tom... And then he thought about his own problems. _Love_. That was the problem... In both their cases. Tom, her current love. Natalie, the woman he used to love. He tilted his head down and buried his face into her hair. He wanted to tell her that everything would be fine, but right now for the two of them, he figured he just couldn't say that. He had no idea what was going on with Sam and Tom, and absolutely no idea what he would do with himself after this. He was alone, well and truly. Yet when he had taken Sam into his arms, he suddenly felt at ease.. Like he had her there and **_he needed her there_**_, _that was all that mattered.

They slowly pulled apart a few minutes later, both of them locking eyes as they did so, smiles appearing on their faces.

"Thank you." Sam spoke first.

"For what? A hug?"

She nodded and looked away, suddenly feeling shy. "You don't have any idea how much better it made me feel."

He smiled again._ He understood. _He understood a hell of a lot more than she knew. He lifted his hand to her chin and gently pulled her to face him. "Well in that case, thank you too."

She smiled and reached up, placing her hand on top of his. She left it there for a moment, before dropping it to her side and turning to the sofa. He pulled his hand back and watched her as she pulled a few things out of her bag. "I need to change.. I'll be back soon." She said, walking towards the door.

On the way here, she'd rushed back home and grabbed a bag, trying to be as quiet as possible. She'd also tried to avoid looking at Tom as he slept in their bed, she'd felt incredibly guilty, a sickly feeling in her gut and left the house as soon as she possibly could.

She headed towards the nearest toilet to change into her shorts and big shirt that she'd grabbed to sleep in, her brush in her hand too. She just couldn't believe what she'd done. _Such a fool!_

Fletch watched her leave, then took the opportunity to slip into his tracksuit bottoms and plain t-shirt. He then turned the lamp on, and switched the main light off. Sam was gone a while, so he used the time to transfer her items onto the bed, and then make himself comfy on the sofa. There was no way that he was going to let her sleep on the sofa, what kind of gentleman would that make him? And anyway, he needed to get used to it, he'd be sofa-hopping a lot from now on, well until he got everything sorted.

* * *

Sam returned to find him laid on the sofa, a thin blanket from the cupboard covering him. He looked up and smiled at her as she entered, and she sent a frown in his direction.

"I told you that I'd sleep on there." She said, putting her hands on her hips.

"I know, and I told you that you could sleep on the bed." He replied.

She rolled her eyes and shoved her clothes into her bag, before dropping it on the floor. "You can't be warm with that tiny blanket over you."

"It was the only thing in the cupboard."

Sam checked for herself, then sighed. "I wish you'd have just let me stay on there."

"No, Sam. Look at what you're wearing.. I'm almost certain that I'm twenty times warmer than you would be on here!"

She sighed again and pulled back the duvet on the bed. "Don't be silly, the cold doesn't bother me."

Fletch rolled his eyes. "Give up, Sam. You're staying there, end of."

"Fine." She climbed into the bed and pulled the duvet over her, then reached out and turned the lamp off. "Night Fletch."

"Night." He replied.

She rolled over onto her side and stared at the tiny window. She knew that she wouldn't get much sleep, not with today's events playing on her mind. She knew that when she went to visit that old friend with Iain in the week, that she should have told Tom.. But she knew that he would have reacted badly. Yet it seems that her decision to hold back that information had caused an even worse reaction, and then she went and kissed Iain tonight? What had she been thinking?! It was bad enough that after her argument with him earlier, Tom now thought that she didn't want to get married to him, which wasn't the case. But kissing her ex wasn't the right thing to do to solve this issue.

Fletch laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. He knew that Natalie wouldn't let him back home. He wouldn't be home for Christmas... He wouldn't get to see the children's faces as they opened their presents. He wouldn't get to see the great big grin on Ella's face when she opened the dress that she'd been dying to get since her birthday, and he wouldn't see Mikey's loud shout of 'Yeah! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!' When he opened the bike that they'd saved up for since last Christmas. Then there was Evie, that would tear anything open and squeal at the sight of it, just so happy to have presents from Santa. He could feel tears stinging in his eyes at the thought of missing these precious moments, and it was even worse that he couldn't do anything about it. Even if he did find a sofa to sleep on, whoever it belonged to wouldn't want his three kids there for the evening.. And he didn't have any presents to give them anyway, he'd just disappoint them. He was already disappointing them.

It was silent in the tiny on-call room for about half an hour. Both Sam and Fletch were awake, both staring at something through the darkness, mulling over the reasons why they were even here. Sam had wanted to invite Fletch to squeeze in the bed with her, but hesitated and then eventually said nothing. She knew that whatever the reason that caused him to be here must have had something to do with his wife, so suggesting that he sleep in a bed with another woman was perhaps the wrong thing to do. But it was just sleeping. And Sam felt like all the thinking she was doing was distressing her, she wanted to feel that serenity again, the serenity that she'd strangely found with Fletch.

Eventually, she spoke. "Fletch? Are you still awake?"

She was expecting no answer, but there was a sniff and the clearing of a throat, then she heard his voice. "Yeah."

"I.. Um.. I could do with another hug.." She mumbled.

There was no reply, but she heard the rustling of his blanket being thrown back and then the quiet footsteps as he approached her. She felt her own duvet move as Fletch slid in beside her, then his warm arms found their way around her waist and pulled her close. She placed her hands on his torso and snuggled into his chest, that feeling of serenity filling her senses again.

Fletch held Sam against him and stared at the wall behind her. He couldn't stop thinking about what an idiot he was, how badly he'd timed it. Of course, he'd brought it on himself, but now he was wishing that he had waited until after Christmas to come clean. It was wrong, of course, he shouldn't have ever given himself a reason to come clean.. He shouldn't have had that fling with Tess, but he just wished he could have been with his kids just that tiny bit longer. They were the most important thing in his life.

The pair of them laid there in silence for a few moments, until Sam whispered. "I love him..." She wasn't sure why she felt the need to say it out loud, perhaps to prove it to herself, or to get the confidence to state that she really was in love with Tom to someone else that she loved.

Fletch looked down at Sam, and saw the tears glistening in her eyes. He softly kissed her forehead, then nodded. "I know you do. There's no one who could love Tom more than you."

A tear rolled down Sam's cheek and she quickly wiped it away. She knew that Fletch understood how much she loved Tom, if only the man himself could get it too.

Nothing more was said between the two of them for the rest of the night. They both just laid and mulled over their situations some more. Some how, both of them refrained from crying, even if they were both over thinking, their minds not letting them rest.

Fletch fell asleep first. Sam guessed that it was about two when she looked up and saw his eyes closed, his breathing slow, and a small pout on his lips. It made her smile. She was half-tempted to search for her phone and snap a picture of him, so she could wind him up in the morning, add some normality back into their lives. But nothing could feel normal at this particular time. Even if she wanted to do that, she wouldn't. I mean, imagine the things that could spread around the ED if anyone caught sight of a picture of Fletch asleep on her phone. The fact that Tom was going to propose to her had spread like quick fire, this wouldn't be a good idea. She sighed and got herself comfortable, then closed her eyes and tried to sleep. There was so much going on in her mind, and she knew it was only about four hours before she needed to get up and work.

If only she'd gone about things differently.. If only Iain hadn't started at Holby. Yet she couldn't just blame him..._ It wasn't just his fault_, her actions had caused all of this too. She wasn't about to lose Tom. She would do whatever it took to keep him, because she loved him more than she'd ever loved anyone before. She wanted to marry him, without the big white wedding and all that crap, she just wanted it to be the two of them. _Heck_, she'd even move away if she had to! In fact, that could be great, they could start fresh.. New jobs, new friends.. Away from Iain.. It could be perfect if they allowed it to be.

She fell asleep just half an hour later... And she slept quite peacefully. The four small hours of sleep that they managed to get was quiet and calm. Whether it was because they were in each others presence, or because they were away from the drama for a bit, they managed to cope with their make do home for the night. Strangely, yet perfectly, happy.


	2. Chapter 2

**I was going to leave it as just the one-shot... But tonight's episode was fucking horrible and now I'm feeling really emotional. I mean Fletch didn't even get to see Sam and Tom get married? Do you even realize how fucking hard that hit me in the feels? RIGHT IN THE FEELS. I'm done. This show, ugh!**

* * *

He knew as soon as he got into that car. He knew that they'd give him one call. He sure as bloody hell knew who it was that he was going to use it on. He remembered her number... Sad as it was, but he'd spent the last week staring at it listed on his phone, wondering if she'd be able to talk. But everything with her and Tom had started to get back on track, so he'd thought it best not to interrupt their evenings. He'd stared at the number so often that he knew it off by heart. He was going over it in his head right now.

He barely remembered being walked through into custody. He'd emptied his pockets, handed everything over in a daze. He was repeating her number in his head. He confirmed his name and told them his current address, he signed the sheet to confirm that he'd given them everything he had in his possession. They'd taken him to a cell, told him to stay calm and that they just wanted to interview him.

But he was calm.. They didn't need to tell him to be. All the things he'd experienced over the last few weeks, losing his family, possibly losing his job, the last thing he wanted to do was lose her now.

"Do I get a phone call?" He asked, taking a seat on the hard bench.

"Only one." The officer confirmed what he had already known.

"When can I take it?"

"Give me a few minutes." He was told, then the door shut loudly, and was bolted with a clang.

He lent back and sighed. What was the point in locking the door? He wasn't going to go anywhere... He had no reason to go anywhere. He was going to prove his innocence, then hopefully get a chance to see the one person he really needed before she left.

He though about the call...

Tess? He could have called her. She probably wouldn't have been much help though, she'd just feel terribly guilty over the IV situation.

Zoe? He could have called her too, but it was evident that she'd had enough of him tonight.

Jamie? Well, he was living at Jamie's now.. He'd have to tell him what was going on...

But Fletch didn't care about any of that. There was only one person that he wanted to call, one person he needed to set things straight with.. Before she disappeared into the sunset to start her new life.

The bolt on the door slid across again, and the door opened. "You can come and make your call now."

* * *

Sam and Tom had headed home after their wedding reception. The horse and carriage had taken them the short distance to the pub across the road, where they had a few drinks with their colleagues and their first dance, before leaving. They were heading off early in the morning, so they didn't want to be up too late.

But throughout the night, Sam'd had a little ache in her heart. She was happy. More than happy to finally be married to Tom, it was in fact the best day of her life. she hadn't begged him to marry her earlier on in rhesus for nothing... But there was someone missing. The one person that she wanted to be there most. He hadn't been present in the ceremony, nor the reception, and she wondered why. Had there really been something more important than her wedding? Of course, she initially hadn't invited him.. They'd invited no one, but seeings as it had become a little public, she'd expected him of all people to be there...

She ignored the feeling all night. She laughed and joked with her colleagues, she danced with her new husband, kissed him excitedly. Today was the start of their new life. Goodbye Holby, hello world!

Tom had carried her across the threshold of their flat and she'd giggled and pressed her lips to his passionately. It had been an amazing evening, and she couldn't wait to spend the night in her new husbands arms.

Tom sat her down on the sofa and kissed her once more, before whispering in her ear: "Stay here, Mrs Kent."

She smirked at him and narrowed her eyes. "Why? Where are you going?" She asked suspiciously.

"You'll see!" He called over his shoulder and disappeared into the kitchen.

When he was out of sight, she sat back and smiled to herself. She was so happy, and so incredibly lucky. She shrugged off her shawl, and lent down to pull her heels off of her feet. As she sat back up, she heard Tom's footsteps approaching.

"Your phone's buzzing.. It's a call." he told her, pulling it out of his pocket where she had asked him to keep it safe all evening.

"Oh, I wonder who's calling me at this time?" She said, standing up to take it from him.

He passed it to her and smiled. "I'll be back in a second."

She nodded and waited until he disappeared again to look down at her phone. Unknown number? She frowned out of confusion, and answered it. "Hello?"

"Sam?" It was the one person that she had wanted to hear from. "Oh, Sam!" She heard the relief in his voice.

"Fletch?"

"Look, I don't have long to talk..."

"What? Why? Where are you? Why weren't you at the wedding?" She asked, that aching feeling in her chest now stronger than ever.

Fletch could tell that she was hurt that he hadn't been there. "Sam, I'm really sorry. I really wanted to be there.. But I er, I've been arrested."

"You what?!"

"It was to do with that patient who's IV I messed up a few months back, but it doesn't matter now. What matters is you, only you. Did you have a good night?"

She felt tears stinging in her eyes. Fletch had been arrested, and was more concerned about knowing how her night went? "Wait, do you only get one call?"

"Yes."

"And you chose to call me?"

"Yeah..."

"Oh, Fletch!" She could feel the lump in her throat and she was close to tears. "You didn't have to call me.. Why not a solicitor to help you?"

"Because I didn't want to.. A solicitor doesn't matter, I couldn't care less about anyone and anything else right now.. I just needed to know how everything went." He was also starting to get tearful. "I missed your wedding Sam, I need you to know that I would have done anything to be there..."

"I know you would have..." She sniffed. "It was beautiful, Fletch. It was the best day of my life.. I just wish that you could have been there too, I was hoping to get a dance with you at the reception."

Fletch took a deep breath, holding back the tears that were threatening to fall. "That's good. I'm so happy that you had a good day. I'm so sorry that we didn't get a chance to do that... I really am."

"I know... I know." Sam blinked a few times and swallowed.

"Look, I don't think I'll be out of here by the time you leave tomorrow... So if I don't get to see yo-"

"-No!" Sam snapped. "Don't say that. I know what you're going to say... And I don't think I could handle hearing it." A tear slid down her cheek.

"But I want you to know.."

"Fletch.."

"Okay." He said. There was a sound of a man talking in the back ground, before he spoke again. "I have to go now.."

"No.." Sam whispered. "Ask for five minutes more!"

"Sam, I can't." He told her. "They won't let me."

"Just five minutes! Let me talk to them, I'll convince them!"

"No. I can't." He sighed. "I just wanted to let you know that even though I wasn't there, I'm proud of you for getting through everything that happened over the last few weeks and finally becoming Mrs Kent. I bet you looked beautiful."

Sam choked back some more tears, then she had an idea. "When you're released, I don't care what bloody time it is, even if it's tomorrow afternoon, I want you to get them to call me. I'll come and pick you up."

"No, Sam you can't do that.. You have to leave tomorrow morning!"

"I'm not leaving without saying goodbye to you!"

The man in the background spoke again and Fletch sighed once more. "Fine. But if Tom's unhappy with it, then that's-"

"-My problem, I know!"

"I'll see you, then." He said.

Sam nodded to herself, a small smile on her lips. "Yeah... Fletch?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

She heard him sniff on the other end of the phone. "I love you too, Sam."

"Good." She replied, and heard a quiet chuckle before the line went dead.

She hung up the phone and put it on the arm of the sofa. She sat down and put her head in her hands. The happiest day of her life and her best friend hadn't been there to see it. He had been arrested instead, and there had been a possibility that they weren't going to get to say goodbye before she left. Not anymore. She was determined to have one last special moment with Adrian Fletcher, even if it upset her husband.

She took a deep breath, and wiped her eyes, before standing up and walking through to the kitchen.

"No, Sam don't come in! Don't look!" Tom said happily, before glancing over his shoulder and pausing. "Sam? Are you okay? What's happened?"

She felt herself start to crumble again and burst into tears. He stopped whatever he was doing and rushed over to her, pulling her into his arms.

"We can't leave tomorrow..." She mumbled between sobs.

"What do you mean we can't leave? It was your idea!" Tom questioned. "Who was that on the phone?"

"No, we can't leave until I've said goodbye..."

"To who?"

"Fletch." She told him, and looked up to see his worried facial expression change.

He now understood. She'd told him about how she felt towards Fletch a few days after the night they'd stayed in the on-call room. She informed Tom about how much she loved Fletch as a brother figure, and that he'd helped her with her problems. And the best part was that he completely understood her, and strangely there was no hint of jealousy in it at all.

"Why wasn't he there tonight?"

"He was arrested."

"What? Why?!"

She shook her head. "It doesn't matter why, but I can't leave without saying goodbye."

"Right. Has he been released yet?"

"No.. He's going to call me as soon as he is though."

"But what if we have to leave before then?"

"We can't." She told him.

He sighed. "Sam..."

"Tom, please! We'll pack the car... Be ready to leave at any second.. I just need ten minutes to say goodbye to him, then we can leave and never have to come back again!"

It was silent for a few seconds, and Sam could've sworn that she could hear her heart thumping like a drum.

"Fine." Tom said, gently reaching up and cupping her face in his hands. "Anything for you."

She smiled and another tear fell down her cheek. "I love you so much!"

"I love you too."

* * *

**5am**. That's when Fletch called Sam from the station.

**5.03am** was when she finally managed to wake Tom and tell him that she was taking the car.

**5.15am**, the time that she slid on her shoes after rushing around to pull on some clothes and run a brush through her hair.

**5.35am**. That's when she pulled up outside the station.

Fletch had been sat on the curb in front of the main doors, still in his scrubs and hoody. He hadn't slept a wink and was knackered and anxious. The minute he saw Sam's car pull up, he climbed to his feet and watched her. She turned the engine off and yanked the keys out of the ignition. She flung the door open and legged it across the car park to where the man she'd been waiting all night for was now waiting for her.

She dived into his arms, and he stumbled backwards a little, clutching her close to him. At one point, her feet weren't even touching the floor. It took a matter of seconds for Sam to start blubbering like a baby again, and he held her in his arms until her felt her slowly calm down.

"I'm so sorry Sam..." He whispered.

She took a deep breath, then stepped back and looked up at him. "Don't say sorry. I know how much you wanted to be there."

He nodded and blinked away the tears that were starting to fill his eyes. "I need to say something else too... Thank you. Thank you so much for being there for me... The last few weeks, they wouldn't have been bearable without you. Last night too, I don't think I'd have remained so calm if I hadn't of heard your voice and known that I would get to see you before you left."

More tears rolled down her cheeks. "You too. The only reason that I'm happily married now is because you helped me see sense. You didn't even need to say anything, it was just the way you held me..." She brought her hands up to cover her face for a second as she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to hold back her tears.

"You and Tom, you're perfect together, you know that?"

She nodded and took another breath before removing her hands. "And you, Adrian Fletcher... You may not think it, but you are perfect too. You're a rock. My rock. You've changed my life over a matter of weeks... so don't you ever let anyone tell you that you're nothing."

He shook his head, more tears in his eyes. "Don't be silly..."

"No, I mean it! Because you're not nothing, no one can ever tell you that... You're something alright." She sniffed. "You're my something."

He chuckled as a tear drop fell from his eye. "Your something?"

"Yes, my something." She smiled through her tears and took his hand. "It may not mean anything to anyone else, but to us it does."

He nodded and smiled, before pulling her into another bone crushing hug. "I'm going to miss you..." He whispered.

"I'll miss you too." She whispered back. "But you know my number, I'm not changing it, so you can call me whenever you need to and you're always welcome to visit.. Just don't tell anyone else." She joked.

He chuckled again. "Okay. I definitely will." He pressed a kiss to her forehead, then they separated again.

"I mean it. Any time, any day.. It doesn't matter. You can call, and I'll be there.. I promise."

"Maybe not at one in the morning.."

She laughed. "Well, no perhaps not one, but I wouldn't be angry if you did."

He smiled and kissed her forehead once more. "Go on, you've got a husband waiting for you at home."

"Will you be okay to get home?"

He nodded. "Yeah, Jamie's ain't far from here."

"Alright." She smiled at him, and sniffed. "See you then.."

"Yeah.. Bye." He watched as she slowly turned and walked back over to her car. She got in and started it up, then waved at him as she plugged herself in. He didn't wait for her to pull away, the awful pang in his heart painful enough from seeing her just walk away.

Sam started to drive away, watching him walk away in the opposite direction. She was so close to bursting out into hysterical tears again, she didn't want to leave him, but she knew it was for the best. Things between her and Tom would be easier when they were away from Holby.

She stopped at the junction, waiting for a car to pass so that she could pull out, but paused when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She frowned and pulled it out, wondering who would call at this time in the morning. The number was with-held.

She slid her finger across the screen to answer it. "Hello?"

"You said any time.. How about now?" The cheeky voice on the other end spoke. "Turn around."

She looked up at the mirror, and spotted the blue scrubs, then quickly twisted her body to look out of the back window. She giggled at the sight of Fletch stood there, looking at her car, his phone held to his ear.

"It's a perfect time." She answered his question.

"Good, because I was just checking that you'd not forgotten your promise already."

"How could I ever forget it?!" She cried, feeling tearful yet again.

He chuckled. "I love you, Sam."

She smiled. "I love you too."


End file.
